Jasmine Rice And Atheist Philanthropists

I just got back from visiting my family for a week, and one of my vacation rituals is finally having the free time to read the Sunday New York Times. Life's just too hectic to get involved with a five dollar paper every single week. The posts below are some of the things that caught my eye as I read the last two weeks of Sunday papers.

*

What Should A Billionaire Give...And What Should You?

This article on charity has already disappeared into the Times pay archives, but here's the part I found really interesting. Emphasis mine:

Interestingly, neither Gates nor Buffett seems motivated by the possibility of being rewarded in heaven for his good deeds on earth. Gates told a Time interviewer, "There's a lot more I could be doing on a Sunday morning" than going to church. Put them together with Andrew Carnegie, famous for his freethinking, and three of the four greatest American philanthropists have been atheists or agnostics. (The exception is John D. Rockefeller.) In a country in which 96 percent of the population say they believe in a supreme being, that's a striking fact. It means that in one sense, Gates and Buffett are probably less self-interested in their charity than someone like Mother Teresa, who as a pious Roman Catholic believed in reward and punishment in the afterlife.

*

Also, a recipe!

Jasmine-Tea Rice

2 ½ tablespoons jasmine-tea pearls
1 ½ cups jasmine white rice
1 teaspoon kosher salt.

1. In a medium saucepan, bring 2 cups water to a boil. Place the tea in a heatproof bowl. Cover with the hot water and steep for 5 minutes. Strain through a sieve set over the saucepan and cool.

2. In a large bowl, rinse the rice with cold water until the water runs clear. Drain and add to the cooled tea. Stir in the salt and let sit for 30 minutes.

3. Cover the saucepan and place over medium-high heat. Bring to a boil, then reduce heat and simmer for 17 minutes. Let stand for 5 minutes.

Serves 6. Adapted from Daniel Patterson.

From The Backyard To The Bedroom To The Drawing Room

From The India Times:

Despite the slowly changing openness towards sexuality, the field of sexual medicine has remained neglected in the land of Kamasutra. And this despite the fact that sexual dysfunction is a common problem — an ongoing study, for instance, has found that one out of every ten Indian women suffer from Early Orgasm Response, a condition wherein females reach orgasm during foreplay. [full article]

Sure, it's easy to laugh, but keep in mind that EOR is more common than you might think. Pretty much every girlfriend I've ever had has been afflicted with it...

A Recent Email Exchange

From: Julie [not her real name]
November 26

what do you do for new years?


From: Johnny
November 27

Charter a jet with a few friends and circle the globe, ringing in the New Year in all 24 time zones. Why?


From: Julie
November 28

REALLY!!?


From: Johnny
December 1

Yeah, but the whole "charter a jet and fly around the world" thing is a bit more complicated than I let on. You see, there are five of us in the so-called "Caroline Society," each of us members of the secretive Club Priapus, and all of us world-renowned for our fluency in the languages of love:

Sir Charles Mortdecai, a British art dealer who's worth is estimated in the billions of pounds sterling...but who once, to settle a wager, seduced a female member of Parliament while disguised as a common street tramp.

Pierre Des Esseintes, a legendary gourmand who killed his own brother in a duel, can make any woman fall in love with him with merely a glance.

Alejandro Martín DeLeon, the former Spanish Formula 1 racer, whose spectacular crash seven years ago left him with a limp and a faint scar that has--like all flaws in a thing otherwise perfectly beautiful--left him only that much more irresistible to the women of High Society.

Faustina Madalena Girolamo, the famous lesbian libertine, rumored cause of many of today's most scandalous divorces, who wears only shades of black in mourning for a tragedy she's never revealed.

Also: me.

Every year, we meet in the Republic of Kiribati, a small archipelago in the South Pacific. Kiribati's easternmost island, the uninhabited Caroline Atoll, is situated directly on the International Date Line and is therefore the first place on the planet to receive the New Year. That evening, after each member of our informal Society arrives at the small tattered airport, we take a water taxi to a yacht anchored just off the cost of the Caroline Atoll, where we enjoy a delicious feast with none other than Manchester Victorian, our mysterious benefactor.

MENU
Sea Holly salad
Bread served with dawamesk
Oysters sprinkled with the dust of rhinoceroses horn
Turtle eggs served raw with salt and lime juice
Pastilles Richelieu

Our meal finished, Manchester Victorian rises from his seat at the head of the table and offers us a toast: "Let the sky rain potatoes; let it thunder to the tune of Green-sleeves, hail kissing-comfits and snow eringoes, let there come a tempest of provocation..." The words resonate heavily behind the chromed Cupid face mask he wears at all times.

For 24 hours straight, we travel to every time zone and celebrate the New Year two dozen times. Across all cultures and nations, there is one global tradition that unites humanity: kissing someone at midnight on New Year's Eve. The goal of the Caroline Society is simple...we must find the most attractive woman possible to kiss at the stroke of midnight, as our picture is secretly taken by one of our footmen, disguised as fellow partygoers.

The day of seduction completed, we gather at the false London storefront that hides the opulent Club Priapus, each of us falling into an exhausted sleep in one of the many boudoirs of the Club. Then, on the evening of January 2, the other 22 members of the Club arrive for a raucous meal. (Though the explanation is too lengthy to get into here, there are always only 27 members of the Club, or three to the third power.)

Manchester Victorian, via a large video screen, introduces the evening's main entertainment: the judging of the photographs. Time zone by time zone, photographs of whom each of us kissed on our around-the-world journey is presented to the club. One point is scored for each time zone we win, and the one with the most points at the end of the presentation is of course the winner of that year's contest.

The victor receives a small golden tie tack in the shape of a Cantharide, the right to be served first at all Club functions, and a personal note of congratulations from Victorian himself. These are all nice, of course, but the most important prize can't be named or held...namely, the respect and esteem of the legendary Club Priapus!

89 Gangs

There were dozens of gangs referenced in the original screenplay of THE WARRIORS, but most didn't make it to the screen. This is the official list of gangs from the original script:

The Alleycats
The Amsterdam All-Stars
The Baseball Furies
The Black Hands
The Blackjacks
The Big Trains
The Boppers
The Boyle Avenue Runners
The Charlemagnes
The Colt 45's
The Dealers
The Delaney Rovers
The Dingos
The E Street Shufflers
The East Harlem Hurricanes
The Easy Aces
The Electric Eliminators
The Eighth Avenue Apaches
The Fastballs
The Fifth Street Bombers
The Filmores
The Firetasters
The Five Points
The Gerrards
The Gladiators
The Go Hards
The Gun Hill Dancers
The Gramercy Riffs
The Harlem Boppers
The Hi-Hats
The High Rollers
The Homeboys
The Hoplites
The Howitzers
The Huks
The Hurricanes
The Imps
The Jesters
The Jones Street Boys
The Judas Bunch
The Jupiters
The Knockdowns
The Knuckles
The Lizzies
The Locos
The Magicians
The Meatpackers
The Metropolitans
The Moonrunners
The Napoleons
The Nickel Steaks
The Nightriders
The Ninth Avenue Razors
The Orphans
The Panzers
The Phillies
The Plainsmen
The Predatoz
The Punks
The Queen's Bridge Mutilators
The Real Boys
The Red Hook Shooters
The Roadmasters
The Rogues
The Romans
The Runaways
The Saracens
The Saratogas
The Satan's Mothers
The Savage Huns
The Shanghai Sultans
The SouThern Cross
The Speedwagons
The Stevedores
The Stilletos
The Stonebreakers
The Terriers
The Turks
The Turnbull AC's
The Van Cortlandt Rangers
The Whispers
The Warriors
The Xenophones
The Xylophones
The Yo-Yo's
The Youngbloods
The Zodiacs
The Zulus

Hot Videos Of Tranny Action

A quick addendum to my earlier music video post.

Cyn reminded me of this great video for The New Pornographer's "Sing Me Spanish Techno," starring Juanita More and Michael Venus, legendary drag queens from San Francisco and Vancouver, respectively. (Apparently I know a lot about drag queens?)

Those of you in the know...who is that bartender? That's gotta be a cameo...

And, to tie it back into my earlier post, here's the similar, but way more eerie, video for The Knife's "Pass This On."The lead singer of The Knife (uh, not the ladydude in the video, but the girl at the very end) is featured in the Royksopp video that I (and Cyn!) recently posted.

from Ghost Tantras, by Michael McClure

I WAS HERE AND I LIKED IT!
It was all O.K.
I suffered.
There were scents, and flowers, and textures, beautiful women.
I was a handsome man. I invented love.
I radiated genius for those who saw me with loving eyes.
I was happy -- I laughed and cried. Constantly new
sights and sounds. I trembled and sweated
at the sight of beauty. I laughed at strong
things because I loved them -- wanting to kick them in
and make freedom. When I go I'M GONE.
Don't resurrect me
or the duplicates of my atoms.
It was perfect!
I am sheer spirit.

Oh Kristy, why can't I trust you?

I just got this fascinatingly complex bit of MySpace spam that I wanted to share with you guys. Needless to say, I've edited out the link:

Subject: Hey Johnny

Message: How's it goin? I'm Kristy, I just moved to the The New Orleans Diaspora area and I wanna meet a nice guy around here :). I moved here to Louisiana a couple of weeks ago for work and now that I'm here I have nobody to hang out with! I read your profile... You're cute and I liked what you had to say :).

I'm 25/F/single and I lookin for a guy who is a little bit older or more mature than me. You say you're 32 and you're cute so I guess you're qualified ;)

My friend Jen from back home suggested I tried using myspace to meet people in my area. I just signed up and my profile sux hehe. I do have a blog/profile page at [XXX] ... I have alot of photos and stuff up if you wanna see me ;)

I also left ya a personal message on my blog so come check it out k?

Lookin forward to chattin with ya,
Kristy

What's interesting about this is that the spambot mined my profile in a very convincing way. It got my name, my age, my city AND my state, and integrated them seamlessly into the message. I might have been tricked enough to click on the link if it weren't for The New Orleans Diaspora (which I still have listed as my city, though this hasn't been true for over a year now.)

In fact, the spambot even knew that 32>25, and sent me the "guy who is a little bit older" version of the message. The fact that I'm now old enough to be targeted by Daddy Fantasy spam is too depressing to comment on right now.

I know that nothing in the message is very hard to pull off AT ALL--and in fact, some of you may have already seen a version of this a hundred times before--but I'm always impressed by something that's well done. Even spam, I guess.

Hey, they even got all their apostrophes in the right place.

Royksopp Daisy Chain

Royksopp has an incredible--and incredibly creepy--new video:

ROYKSOPP - WHAT ELSE IS THERE
"...seven days..."

But then, Royksopp always has great videos...

ROYKSOPP - EPLE
Okay, well, this video isn't actually that great--I keep waiting for it to turn into a HP ad at the end--but I do love the song. Good luck getting that earwig out of your head anytime in the next three weeks.

ROYKSOPP - POOR LENO
That's Lee-no, not Len-o. Doesn't the little guy in this video look just like David Foster Wallace? Something about this video reminds me of Lambchop's beautiful "Is A Woman." And since I only need the slightest provocation to link to that:

LAMBCHOP - IS A WOMAN
It begins solemn and sad, then turns absurd, then surprises you with a "blink your eyes a few times and clear your throat" ending. This is my favorite video ever...I'm not going to be emo and claim that I choke up every single time I watch it, but almost always. This was directed by a design company called Shynola, who also did...

JUNIOR SENIOR - MOVE YOUR BODY
and also...

STEPHEN MALKMUS - JOJO'S JACKET
How would I even begin to describe what happens here? But I will say that, like the Lambchop video, it transcends its absurdity and becomes unexpectedly touching just at the end. (Or maybe it's just me.)

BLUR - COFFEE AND CIGARETTES
Okay, I didn't want to post this because we're really going off on a tangent here--believe it or not, I'm still talking about Royksopp--and also because I'm sure everyone reading this has seen this video before. But how can we talk about music videos whose endings touch you deeply and NOT post this?

Q: Blur or Oasis?
A: Pulp!

ROYKSOPP - REMIND ME
Ah, there we are. This video is fun and infographical (?), but I think it actually has a pretty profound message about how all of us fit into a larger picture. It makes an interesting companion to the very similar video for...

THE FAINT - AGENDA SUICIDE
Your homework: compare and contrast this video with the "Remind Me" video above.

THE KNIFE - HEARTBEATS
The girl floating around and singing in the original Royksopp video is the vocalist for the band The Knife, another Swedish group like Royksopp. These pictures don't do it justice, but The Knife has a genuinely unsettling live show. This video is pretty cruddy, but this is easily one of the best songs of whatever we end up calling this decade.

JOSE GONZALEZ - HEARTBEATS
That last song sounded a little familiar, right? But you couldn't place it, maybe? That's because it was covered in an Iron & Wine-like fashion by Jose Gonzalez--who, despite his name, is also Swedish--and used to score this pretty popular commercial.

IRON & WINE - NAKED AS WE CAME
There's something really simple and profound and ultimately mysterious happening in this video, directed by the artist..the kiss, the rain, the food, and all leading up to the last shot.

Children's Book Illustrations

Arthur Rackham

Grimm's Fairy Tales
page 1
page 2

Alice In Wonderland


Edmund Dulac

Edgar Allen Poe

Hans Christian Andersen
part 1
part 2

Tanglewood Tales


Gustaf Tenngren

Grimm's Fairy Tales
part 1
part 2

Three Early Books (Heidi, Tanglewood Tales, Juan And Juanita)

Small Fry And The Winged Horse

The Little Trapper


Kay Nielson

East Of The Sun And West Of The Moon

Twelve Dancing Princesses

Hansel And Gretel (hi res!)


Frank Reynolds

The Pickwick Papers


Tibor Gergerly

A Day In The Jungle

Bobby And His Airplanes


Mary Blair

Little Verses
part 1
part 2

The New Golden Song Book

Baby's House


Ben de Nunez and Al White

Rocky And His Friends


Mel Crawford

Rootie Kazootie Joins The Circus

Banners & Minotaurs

Wow! What a good idea!

Have you ever wondered where all the advertising banners for art shows go when the shows are over?

Better Wall works with over 20 major art museums and sells them as large scale wall art (with portions of the proceeds going back to the museums). Any damaged banners are recycyled as raw materials and keep vinyl out of landfills, and you can feel good about that.

The stock is always changing (obviously) and is definitely limited edition.

Too bad the posters are 1. pretty banal, 2. covered in ad stuff (obviously), and 3. cost as much as the original artworks.

*

Beth Carter is a UK-based sculptor.

Monkey & Hare
Minotaur Sleeping
Bull & Jester

My second favorite: Minotaur Reading.
My favorite: Minotaur & Moth (The webpage is mis-labeled.)

More info, and many more sculptures here, here, here, and here.

The prices seem quite shockingly affordable. (You can get either two of those beat-up museum banners, or an original sculpture...)